Lyrics:

Brother Ken brought his kids with himThe three from his first wife LynnAnd the two identical twinsFrom his second wife Mary NellOf course he brought his new wife KayeWho talks all about AAChain smokin' while the stereo playsNoel, Noel, The first NoelCarve the turkey turn the ball game onMix Margaritas when the eggnog's goneSend somebody to the Quik-Pak storeWe need some ice and an extension cordA can of bean dip and some Diet RiteA box of pampers , some Marlboro LightsHallelujah everybody say cheeseMerry Christmas from the familyFran and Rita drove from HarlingenI can't remember how I'm kin to themBut when they tried to plug their motor home inThey blew our christmas lightsCousin David knew just what went wrongSo we all waited on our front lawnHe threw the breaker and the lights came onAnd we sang Silent NightOh Silent Night o' holy nightCarve the turkey turn the ballgame onMix Bloody Marys cause we all want oneSend somebody to the Stop 'n GoWe need some celery and a can of fake snowA bag of lemons and some Diet SpriteA box of midol, some Salem LightsHallelujah everybody say cheeseMerry Christmas from the family