Lyrics:

First You Tell Your Draft Board You&ampapos;re Hooked On Dope.**lf**you Don&ampapos;t Need The Army &ampapos;cause You&ampapos;ve Seen Bob Hope.**lf**walk Around The Floor Kinda Nice And Loose.**lf**tell &ampapos;em Your Fiancee&ampapos;s Name Is Bruce.**lf**when They Ask About Your Schooling, Then You Say**lf**that You Studied Under Cassius Clay.**lf**then Put Some Lipstick On When You&ampapos;re Photographed,**lf**and That&ampapos;s What I Call Dodging The Draft!**lf**then You Show The Captain A Note From Mom,**lf**stand There While He Reads It And Suck Your Thumb.**lf**when He Takes Your Family History, State With Pride,**lf**&ampapos;benedict Arnold Was On My Father&ampapos;s Side.&ampapos;**lf**he&ampapos;ll Hand You An Iq Test, Just Look At It With Gloom,**lf**then Fold It Like An Airplane And Sail It &ampapos;cross The Room.**lf**if They Believe You Don&ampapos;t Know Your Fore From Your Aft,**lf**that&ampapos;s What I Call...shirking Your Military Responsibility.**lf**clump Around The Floor Like Your Feet Are Flat.**lf**when They Ask About Your Hearing, Just Say, &ampapos;how&ampapos;s That&ampapos;**lf**if The Sergeant Wants A Cigarette, Treat Him Right,**lf**set Fire To Your Draft Card, And Offer Him A Light.**lf**when You See The Eyechart, Don&ampapos;t Worry At All.**lf**say, &ampapos;i&ampapos;ll Be Glad To Read It, Just Point Me At The Wall.&ampapos;**lf**and If The Draft Board Acts In The Usual Way,**lf**you&ampapos;ll Be What I Call 1-A.**lf**lyricwiki