Lyrics:

Ain't that Zeke sittin' over there? (Yeah, that's him)
Zeke, you dirty so and so, I wanna talk to you, Zeke
You ain't no good, and I ain't no refrigerator
I can't keep nothin'. Pay attention to me

Now listen, old man, you and me been friends for a long time
And up till now we've been gettin' along just fine. But there's a few
Little things I gotta pull your coat about. You pay attention to me
And we ain't gonna fall out

I work nights and I think you've been very kind comin' over and
Stayin' with my wife all the time. But must you use my razor blades?
Buy some, they're only a dime. You call that friendship?

And stop doin' them little dirty tricks like jammin' the chair up
Against the door. You kept me out last night until half past four
I know you didn't mean any harm, but that's enough to make anybody sore
You call that friendship?

What about that night you came and took my wife to the show? I asked her
What movie she saw and she said she didn't know. I told her she couldn't see so good
So don't sit back that far no more. (You ain't no good). That's right, Zeke
You ain't no good

Now I don't get mad like the average cat would do, when she buys me a shirt
And she buys you two. But when she feeds you chicken and steak, and give me Irish stew
You're a lizard in the bushes, that's what you are, that's what you are

And you stop feedin' her that candy and sweet stuff to eat. That jive is makin'
Her talk in her sleep. She kept me awake all last night mumblin' your name
And sayin' 'sure is sweet'

You ain't no friend of mine, Zeke. No friend of mine. But I will tell you, Zeke
I'm real happy. I'm happy as can be about that big insurance policy you and my wife took
Out on me. But what's all that arsenic doin' round the house? That's what I can't see. Zeke
You tryin' to poison something? That's what you don', you tryin' to poison somethin'

And what about that night I came home and caught that lipstick on your face
Yo and my wife broke up the fun and your wrastlin' all over the place. And you told me
You's playin' Cowboy and Indian and you was Chief Rain In the Face. You don't look like
No Indian to me, but I'm gonna scalp ya. That's what's gonna happen. I'm gonna scalp ya

And even when we went on our honeymoon, the bell boy told me you rented the very next room
I know you my friend, but I didn't wanna see you that soon. Don't you never speak to me no more
Zeke. do you call that friendship? (No! No!) You ain't no friend of mine