Lyrics:

No matter where I go, London, Paris, Mexico
Anywhere on Earth, they know my place of birth
I met a girl from London when she sat on Blackpool Pier
She said she could tell
I'm a Lad from Lancashire
She said, \'Are you a nudist?\'
So I blushed and said: \'No fear\'
I'm covered up like a Lad from Lancashire

North or South, when I open my mouth, they know that I'm not Dutch
They can tell I come from Lancashire, but they cant tell me much
I whispered, \'I'll be nudist if you'll be the same my dear\'
She said:
\'No fear, with a Lad from Lancashire\'
A widow nice and young and gay said,
\'Come to tea my dear
I've something nice for a Lad from Lancashire\'
We sat down on the sofa and I felt her creeping near
I said, \'Hee Hee, take care
I'm a Lad from Lancashire\'

North and South, when I open my mouth, they know that I'm not Dutch
They can tell I come from Lancashire, but they cant tell me much
The widow started kissing me and tickling my ear
I tickled her, like a Lad from Lancashire

I went with Jane down Lovers Lane, she whispered in her ear
\'Now do your best for a Lad from Lancashire\'
She said to me when on my knee:
\'You cant do that there ere\'
I said, \'Hey Hey! I can, I'm the Lad from Lancashire\'

North and South, when I open my mouth, they know that I'm not Dutch
They can tell I come from Lancashire, but they cant tell me much
That night when Jane got home again her Ma said:
\'You look queer
I'll bet thas been with that Lad from Lancashire