Lyrics:

Make it like that famous country singer
Or that guy I saw last night on Jerry Springer
Clean me up but let me keep my edge,
In the day I like to keep it dignified
But at night you know I got another side
And I don't give a damn, cause I am what I am
Even if it's really really bad
I've got an Ape Drape, yes I do
They're givin' em to anyone, and that means you
You can drive to Riverside and get one too
And then you'll have an Ape Drape like I do
Go ahead and buzz it 'round the ears
I've been growin' that one braid back there for years
I've had it since the first time I saw Queensryche
The front may conform to society
But the back says I have personality
Even if it's really really, even if it's really really bad
Make it short in front and long in back!
If the top's not short enough that it stands up
I could be thrown out of the Bad Boy Club
But don't you lay a finger on my pony tail
Now fix my kid so he looks just like me,
And then matching crazy pants are all we need
Some may call it child abuse I just call it bonding with your Dad.
Norco Neck Warmer...Norco
Hockey Hair...Canada
Achey-Brakey Hair...Nashville
Mullet...Hoboken
Forbidden Hair...Europe
Sho-lo...Florida